If I Had A Hammer

Subject: If I Had A Hammer Mon Aug 11, 2008 11:23 pm

“If I Had A Hammer”

You know that song by (Ya’ll fill that in, okay!), I cannot remember for the life of me who authored this song and made it famous, The song goes like this….

If I had a hammer- I’d hammer in morning,- I’d hammer in the evening –all of over this land. I’d hammer out danger,- I’d hammer out a warning,- I’d hammer out the love between my brothers and my sisters- all over this land. Anyway you get the drift.

I was thinking about that song. I started thinking about what I would do if I had a hammer. I could conceive of me hammering in the morning, but not too loudly. The folks in my neighborhood wouldn’t take kindly to that kinda noise in the morning. What about hammering in the evening? Seems like my hammering in the evening would have to compete with all the rest of the goings on in the world. Naw! I’d rather hammer in the morning. I’ll get more attention that way.

The folks would probably want to change my name, and it wouldn’t be the “Good Lord” doing it either- with “goodness and mercy following me all the days of my life”.

You know that song where Roberta Flack is singing strong and loud, and she’s asking God “to changer her name”. The folks would be calling my name too, but differently,

“oh yeah”, letting their faces get all ugly and emotional. You know, names like (MF) and (Stupid B) and telling me where they are going to specifically place the hammer on and in my body. You know, stuff like that.

But, this is really important that the message gets out to everybody, so I would keep on hammering - but I would use a kid’s Nerf Hammer. Ain’t no need of pissing off the good sisters and brothers in your own land.

Come on Y’all sing with me…..

I’d hammer out child abuse.

I’d hammer out wife abuse, know a few sisters it’s been done to.

I’d hammer out spouse abuse, for (those brothers all over the land) who are getting their asses kicked too! They were probably taught not to hit woman back, even when she’s wielding a sledgehammer.

I’d hammer out bad parenting, my absentee parents still live in denial.

I’d hammer out bad marriages, boy, would I hammer that one out.

I’d hammer out people who don’t like for you to call them (mf’s) and (sob’s) even when they are treating you like them words. Honey, I don’t care what you were taught in school; adjectives can be verbs and verbs can be nouns it just depends on how folks use them and how you feel after they are done with you.

I’d hammer out keeping food from starving men, women and children all over this world.

I’d hammer out pollution of the environment and wasting good water.

I’d hammer out lack of medicine and bad policies implemented by a few bad men over millions of poor people.

I’d hammer out the “Nigger Complex” all over this land.

I’d hammer out menopause.

I‘d hammer out slavery in parts of Africa and butchery and the loss of millions of people by corrupted governments.

I’d hammer out some love between the Christian Churches who send missionaries to foreign lands. Send them folks some money to help create jobs and industry, along with them Bibles.

I’d hammer out George Bush.

I think the Republican started doing a little hammering themselves while they were inside of them booths. Who knows what goes on behind them closed curtains anyway.

I’d hammer out gay men who do not tell their straight partners what fence they are climbing. (same goes for the sisters who show and don’t tell) Ya’ll cause folks a lot of misery.

I’d hammer out the lack of medical coverage for folks all over the land.

I’d hammer out Aids, Cancer, Alzheimer’s and all horrible diseases.

I’d hammer out Racism between folks who don’t act like my brothers and sisters

Like Opray tells them to.

I’d hammer out suckatash, and PAM in the can, DAMN RIGHT, I would.

I know it ain’t right, especially since this is suppose to be a song of good will, but I would have to save some of my hammering for a few of my family member who have me on their “Hit List of (20) Ways To Screw Your Loud Mouth Sister.

Anyway, I could keep hammering in the morning, hammering in the evening, but my carpal tunnel is starting to kill me. Oh yeah, I would hammer that out too.

I really like this song. All song don’t have to rhyme, you know.

So, Ya’ll starting hammering, no telling what we could accomplish if we all started hammering.

It wouldn’t matter what neighborhood you come from, or what color you are, we’d all be some hammering Mother- Shut – Your- Mouth…..

“If I Had A Hammer”/ 2^nd Phase

by Celestine Wilson Hughes (this is CNyree’s version; 2008)

© 2003

Subject: Re: If I Had A Hammer Mon Aug 11, 2008 11:37 pm

Lemme go find one hammer for Nyree yah. :)

Subject: Re: If I Had A Hammer Thu Aug 14, 2008 11:49 pm

I say Nyree, please don't spoil that hammer. We suppose to use it tomorrow.
But if it dare land in my hand....hum.

One knock-out I will give my papay, the hammer will spoil.